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I have decided to start reviewing again. This time it will be real cons and not just opinions. Here are the Grades


Arkham City: Incredible, Beyond Epic

Arkham Asylum: Fantastic

Lego Batman: Not Bad

Gt: What idiot wrote this piece of trash?

Evolution: Was this written by a Troll?


Bardock The King

Pros

  1. Bardock is well done
  2. Bardock going to hell makes some sense
  3. chapters weren't too long.
  4. King Vegeta would think Bardock was crazy
  5. The attacks made sense and They used more than just one attack.

Cons

  1. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think that once someone dies and goes to Hell, they cannot die again. That Fight was well done but should of lasted much longer.
  2. What is the point of those things at the end of each chapter? Ex:

    The hot blood of battle flows through a warrior

But can their heart still beat for mercy?

what does that even mean?

Conclusion: While not the best story ever this is a good attempt. Plus it has only begun. I shall Continue my review when more of this tale is posted. But for now, my grade is:

Lego Batman


The Last Saiyan

Pros

  1. Written by KidVegeta. This almost always means a good story.
  2. Great character development.
  3. Makes sense that the world ruler would have the dragon balls.
  4. Nir is a interesting character.
  5. Good fight. A little short but whatever
  6. Sky is a good friend
  7. Zirion being angry because of, a muto stabbed his son in the neck makes sense.
  8. Nir being worried about a witness
  9. Nir is a Super Saiyan and the cause makes perfect sense. Most people can't have a believiable transformation. They just have it be out of anger. But KV understands that mere rage is not enough. The rage has to of been caused by a devastraiting event. KV has once again created a believiable transformation.

Cons

  1. Why the Nicknames?
  2. I know the rule don't apply to non full bloods, But what is Nir a reference to?
  3. Why is Jibal forcing kids to fight? Surely this will just cause a bigger rebellion. He isnt a very wise King.
  4. Not only is the king foolish, but he could just nuke the rebels a place a normal bomb on their base.
  5. Why did you have to blow up the earth?
  6. The Space Weepel thing was very confusing.

Conclusion: Another well done KV story. Great detail and good Chapter length. Once again, This story has only just begun. I shall continue my review when more is added.

Grade

Arkham Asylum.

BloodWolf

Pros

  1. Vegeta story
  2. Abridged references are a great idea. and funny
  3. Vegeta is stronger then Goku. It's about time
  4. Everyone is IC.
  5. Vegeta getting annoyed and kidnapping Gohan makes sense.
  6. Good character development
  7. Raditz Vs Yamcha was a good fight.

Cons

  1. Why were all 3 saiyans sent to earth?
  2. You left out the fight between Piccolo and Raditz. That should be included
  3. Minor grammar errors such as not capitalizing Goku.
  4. Gohan becoming like a saiyan is a little OOC. Even when Piccolo trained him, his personality remained the same.
  5. Why is Piccolo working with the Z fighters? He should still be evil at this point

Grade

Lego Batman

The Lost Book

Pros

  1. Good theme
  2. starts with a battle, good idea
  3. Great Villains
  4. Good fights
  5. Vegeta's evil again.
  6. Gotenks is in it.
  7. Broly is also in it.
  8. Hell Saga was good

Cons

  1. Super Red Ball? that's a lame attack name.
  2. Expain the Canon changes before you start the story. Having Gohan in teen form while Goku is a SS3, is big change.
  3. There should be a new paragraph every time someone speaks.
  4. How do they know everyone's names?
  5. Dark Power reminds me of that filler Garlic Jr. Saga.
  6. Really? Vegeta has red hair now? Last time he went evil in canon, it was just a M on his forehead.
  7. Another spirit bomb? be orginal
  8. None of the Sagas are even 10 episodes.

Grade

Lego Batman

Future Imperfect

War Saga:

Pros

  1. Starts with action, great.
  2. Lone wolf is a cool nickname.
  3. Creative to have Ichido be a kai.
  4. Damon seems cool.
  5. Great foreshadowing
  6. K is a cool villain, sp is Kidnioss
  7. So, Charlie uses a sword. better than a gun. Guns are more effective, but they are boring. Joker was right. They are too quick. Just not very entertaining to watch or read.
  8. All fights are well done.

Cons

  1. Ichido is overfident, and how does he know Charlie is part saiyan?
  2. Damon is a Super Saiyan? Please explain this.
  3. I know IDC means "I dont care" but it is best to not use shortened text in your stories. Not everyone knoows what it means.
  4. why is Charlie imagining Goku? he could of had a vision with his dad explaining it. I doubt he even knows who Goku is, let alone what he looks like.
  5. Why is Kidnioss calling Dasson, "Tubia"
  6. why is Switch pretending to be a guy? Who would kill her just because of her gender?
  7. People aren't born with the ability to use ki. They need training.
  8. Why is COMT dancing? an if his dance is anything like the Ginyu force ones or the Fusion Dance, then it can't be a good idea.
  9. What happened to Damon. He hasn't been mentioned since he went Super Saiyan.

Grade

This is my first Rolepay review. I vwill review the next saga later. This one's grade is:

Lego Batman.

In Requiem

This is my 2nd least Favorite story. Only slightly better than KD in my opinion. This mainly because of my hatred for Buu. not just Kid Buu, but all forms of this lameo. Fat Buu sounds like a idiot and looks retarded, Super Buu looks a little cooler I guess but he is so annoying, Kid Buu is just dumb. But i will try to make this review as unbiased as possible.

Pros

  1. Starting right before Buu's death. Interesting.
  2. Very discriptive
  3. Buu assorbs Uub to regain his strength? clever.

Cons

  1. You made the 2nd strongest villain in all of DBZ into a punching bag.
  2. Yemma's logic is flawed. In DBz it is stated that once you die you can't die again. Also, how would Buu escape Hell? I'm pretty sure Hell is harder to escape than that Time Training Room. At most Buu could just terrorize Heaven.
  3. Buu's power only was transfered to Uub? That is bull. It was made perfectly clear in Z that Buu was turned into Uub. Uub is Buu boody and soul. Sure he was removed of all evil, but that is it. This story is completely impossible in the canon universe.
  4. Buu is so weak that a simple slap from Babidi hurts him enough to get him to stop choking the wizard? That is just redicious. So his power level is now 0 or less. So let me get this straight, The most powerful villain injustt the show, is sent to hell and his power level is suddenly zero? That's like saying sunlight makes vampires sparkle. Yes, I just compared this to Twilight. It is that bad.
  5. Baba listens to Buu because he was choking her? She could of just slapped him.
  6. Buu robs a candy store? is that some kind of joke?
  7. Did Buu's breath cause something to fall on Baba? I thought his power was still 0
  8. This fic seems to have just Babidi wanting to control Buu. What about Bibidi? They both used to own Buu. Both should want him to be ubder their control again.
  9. Ledas is in this but does nothing of value? Atleast have him challenge Uub to a fight at the end. I expected him to actually do something, KV. You created this character and after all he did in TF, he does nothing here?
  10. In what universe is this a "short" story? Granted it was just 9 chapters, but they were long ones. This story is not at all short.

Conclusion: this story is trash. I don't see why people here think it is so good. It was even written by KV himself and still failed epicly. He considers this his masterpiece. I disagree. His best work was TF. This is clearly his worst. It seems even great writers like him can mess up sometimes. In my opinion this deserves the Nonsense template a lot more than V does.

Grade:

GT

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