User blog comment:Destructivedisk/D-Disk Reviews/@comment-3097771-20110429040837

Here we go:

Based on personal experience actually. I don't think the emaisl are formal enough for this to matter. Completely my fault. I changed the story from what I had originally intended it to be, which also involved roshi and his guys. Sorry about that! Still don't see how this should be an actual con to the story though. Have nothing to say about this. What was the purpose of the story that the one cubicle worker wrote? It didn't seem to have much of a connection to anything else. Was it characterization maybe? It showed that he had an ego and thought he could write something up, spot o' the moment, that was better than the kid's. Time was up. They had to go out to lunch. ;)
 * In most professional emails, the employees take enough time to fix grammar and spelling; they should not be misspelling words like latter. This is a very minor con, however.
 * The fact that this story you hyped to be a serious drama turned out to be so much a comedy really made the story a letdown. It'd be like going into Inception expecting it to be a documentary.
 * The ending was altogether unsatisfying.
 * For an idea with so much potential, the story is too short.

-KidVegeta