Sweet Nothings About Cuber by KidVegeta and Destructivedisk

This page is a glorification of Hyper Zergling's character, Cuber. Since Cuber doesn't have a personality, history, or much else on his page, this page will serve to remedy that by sharing useful and nifty tidbits about everyone's 8th favorite Saiyan in the whole world.

Cuber's Trivia

 * Cuber does not masturbate the same way his creator Hyper Zergling does.
 * When Cuber gets mad in his base form, he looks like the Hulk.
 * Cuber does not know how to swim.
 * When Radiohead once famously said "Anyone can play guitar!" they didn't know Cuber existed.
 * By the time of his death, Cuber has had sex with Chaiva exactly 2138 times. It would be 2139 if not for an intrusion by Quoeyg one starry night.
 * Cuber was old enough to see Frieza the first time Frieza came to Planet Vegeta.
 * Cuber can use chopsticks, despite being a Saiyan.
 * Cuber wanted to buy a Mrovian fishtank but Chaiva would not allow it. He kept a secret fishtank over at Quoeyg's house, though. He had many spectacular Mrovian fish within it, and Mrovians from Mrovian miles around would come to see the pride of his creation. He later won first place in the regional championships in aquarium competitions.
 * Cuber shaved off all of his pubic hair after seeing it turn yellow once while he was in Super Saiyan form.
 * Cuber was widely considered to be the sexiest male Saiyan on Mrov during his stay there.
 * For Chaiva's 50th birthday, Cuber bought her two fish for his secret fishtank (which he didn't tell her about anyway). So the two went to a nearby pond and threw the fish in there since Cuber wasn't supposed to have anywhere else to put them. Chaiva seemed very gleeful at this and named the fish "diey" and "diey: II still dead" because she hoped they would die in the pond filled with many predators. Later that night after having some sex (with Mrovian condoms so as to not create Skall yet), Cuber snuck out (with his sneaking clothes) and re-captured the two fish and snuck them back into his fishtank. There they remain to this day, not yet dead - although Chaiva believes they are long since dead. She hailed the presents as the finest Cuber had ever given her.
 * Cuber has eaten more food in his lifetime than even Nappa. He throws a lot of it back up, though.
 * Cuber is an accomplished Mrovian yo-yo expert. Sometimes he goes on stage and swings a few of them around to some pretty rockin' music in the background.
 * After meeting Cuber and returning to Earth, Ledas named the biggest rock in front of his house after Cuber. He called it "Cubest".
 * Cuber has never heard of feldspar.
 * Cuber does not consider Mrovian thinking games to be sports.
 * Cuber is undefeated in duels against small Mrovian children.
 * After Cuber died, the Mrovians erected a statue of him that bore a striking resemblance to the statue of Vladimir Lenin in Seatle, Washington, USA.
 * If one looks closely, Cuber appears to be a Chinese-Saiyan of so fine a strain.
 * Cuber was the oldest Saiyan in history to never know about sex. He didn't learn about it until he was in his 40s.
 * During the making of Skall, Cuber remarked to Chaiva that he wanted them to transform, but then realized that a tsunami of semen would demolish the nearby Mrovian town if he grew so large.
 * During the Essentia Saga, while the Saiyans were planet-hopping, Cuber can be clearly seen destroying a population of Rahuls. How the Rahuls managed to thrive on a planet of their own and maintain a sizable population is matter of great controversy. Mrovian scientists and plebeians alike have waged bitter, week-long debates over the Rahul planet, though nothing put forth in those debates has proved to be satisfactory in answering the mystery.
 * At first, Cuber wanted to name his son Dom, but then Chaiva quickly reminded him that Skall needed to be named after a vegetable. He wasn't happy for days, and the Mrovian yo-yos were not seen even once in Cuber's great depression of the 774 Age.
 * Sometimes Cuber dreams of Yuki and these dreams are sexual in nature. Sometimes he dreams of him and Ledas gangbanging the shit out of her, and sometimes he merely dreams of mating with her while in the form of Cubas. Either way, these dreams comprise the Bedtime: Cuber Edition series, a spin-off of the very popular Bedtime series, which features Chaiva fucking the shit out of Ledas and Ryori (without Cuber knowing about it).
 * Since Cuber doesn't know the day of his birth, he celebrates his birthday on the day he got his first fish in his pond (this was before the birthday present fish).
 * One time, Cuber was unable to maintain his erection whilst inside the vaginal cavity of one, Chaiva. He had Quoeyg create a suction device to remedy this problem. As the device required manual use, and Cuber didn't know how to use it, this caused Quoeyg to be present during several mating sessions thereafter. Chaiva complained about it, but only a little bit, because deep down inside (past the back of her vagina), she liked it.
 * Cuber is allergic to cinnamon.
 * Cuber has never been drunk, because he does not like the taste of alcohol (he's a bit of a pussy in that regard, even though alcohol is terrible, terrible poison that tastes awful and makes me want to throw up and after I drink it my eyes burn and my pee-hole's on fire like the Balrog of Khazad-dûm (a proper Flame of Udan if I ever saw one)). Even a few drops would get Cuber exceptionally drunk. However, this would create a paradox in the Dragon Ball universe. If Cuber became drunk, his personality would change a certain amount, due to the effects of the drugs. However, Cuber has no personality (see the above personality header with nothing under it), so alcohol couldn't have any effect, even though it would have to.
 * Cuber has portraits of Jackie Chan in his Mrovian house in the fashion of pictures of Stalin. This is a bit odd, as Cuber seems to be more of a fan of Lenin than Stalin.
 * Cuber folds his tail around his body opposite of the way most Saiyans do. He did this because Macbethi s his favorite Shakespearian play.
 * It is speculated that Cuber had another younger brother, as Hyper Zergling has three younger brothers, and only two of them were represented in his fanons. This younger brother might make an appearance in the last few sagas of The Mrovian Series, after he is sent on an urgent mission to give Cuber more fish for his Mrovian pond. This brother has the most potential out of all of Cuber's brothers, and, accordingly, he does not spam Metaknight as much as the other two do while playing SSBB. Of course, since none of them play SSBB anymore (they are project M elitists in Limbo), it doesn't matter as much as it used to.
 * If Cuber were a polar bear who came across a cactus, he would have sex with the aforementioned cactus.
 * Cuber is the third hottest person that Chaiva has ever had sex with.
 * Like many aspects of his 'personality', Cuber's penis is also modeled based on his creator, Hyper Zergling. In turn it is uncircumcised and still quite short.
 * Before Cuber ejaculates, he quickly gives names to the hundreds of millions of sperm he is preparing to ejaculate. Because of this, Skall was named before Cuber had sex with Chaiva for the sole purpose of procreation.