User blog:Destructivedisk/D-Disk Reviews

As many of you may remember, I long ago did a humorous review column called Destructivedisk Reviews. However, I got bored with that and am now going to do a genuine review blog in celebration of my edit count reaching 12^3. So, request your fics or just general fics and I'll try to review them!

My review scale goes by letters and such. It's like this:

S+ = Perfect

S = Incredible

S- = Fantastic

A+ = Great

A = Pretty Good

A- = Good

B+ = Above Average

B = Average

B- = Below Average

C+ = Bad

C = Pretty Bad

C- = Very Bad

D+ = Terrible

D = Very Terrible

D- = Horrid

E+ = Very Horrid

E = Horrible

E- = Very Horrible

E-- and below = The culmination of all that is horrible in the universe; this is the epitome of horrible

Pros

 * Tien is a major character

Cons
Closing Comments: This fic is attrocious
 * Terrible writing
 * Unbelievably unoriginal story. Half the plot is a rip-off of Dragon Ball Z.
 * Goku/Shenron training is horribly executed
 * Dragon Goku

Rating = E-

Dragon Ball Z: Futuristic Tales
Pros
 * Story is original
 * Characters are pretty consistent with canon personality
 * Cool title

Cons
Closing Comments: Interesting premise, but needs quite a bit of clarification.
 * Writing style is just strange
 * Swearing seems superflous
 * I really have no idea what's going on.

Rating = E-

Dragon Ball: AW
Pros
 * Solid writing
 * Nice prose
 * Interesting

Cons
Closing Comments: Short, but sweet thus far.
 * Alternate Universe
 * Not very developed, so I don't know where the story is going

Rating = I can't honestly give it a rating with this little revealed

Pros

 * Solid writing


 * All the Z Fighters do fight, although most are ineffective


 * No characters are glorified


 * Solid action scenes


 * All around enjoyable
 * Character Development for existing characters is good
 * Tien plays a nice role near the end
 * Villains are great

Cons

 * Lots of overpowering


 * Super Saiyan 5 and 6


 * (Relatively) Unoriginal


 * Krillin's the only one who actually gets injured badly


 * Gohan's a SSJ3


 * Far too much indirect dialog earlier on


 * Logical Fallacies
 * The story can be inconsistent at time, such as Krillin getting injured but later fighting
 * If you count Yajirobe as a Z Fighter, then he is quite OOC. I dislike that he is the only one to not fight.
 * Inconcclusive ending
 * The appearance of Bardock and King Vegeta makes little to no sense.

Closing comments: Although entertaining, this fic is greatly overrated and has quite a few large flaws.

Rating = C+

Pros

 * Writing is decent


 * Works with canon

Cons

 * Fight scenes are terrible


 * Goray is a terrible, terrible Gary-Stu.


 * Using Broly as a villain is unoriginal


 * Sagas are too short


 * Too much reliance upon Super Saiyan and RoSaT

Closing comments: Largely flawed. Rating == D+

Pros

 * Grammar, spelling, and grammar are above par


 * Theme songs are good, 'specially Weezer


 * The addition of pictures makes it look better


 * The humor does help to dull out zsome of the boredom


 * Kudos to you for taking my advice and shortening the paragraph size

Cons

 * Humor is excessive and overly silly


 * How did the army get their hands on Brly's DNA?


 * Broly jr. is a somewhat unoriginal character


 * Broly jr. is a Gary-Stu


 * Overuse of parentheses in dialog


 * Brolia, all about her


 * Story quickly strays away from the rest of the Z Fighters and focuses only on Broly Jr., which made me lose interest


 * Captions are random


 * The whole "secret agent " thing is just strange and does not work in Dragon Ball.

Closing comments: Decent, but with a great many flaws

Rating: D+

Pros

 * Nonexistent

Cons

 * The entire plot is ridiculous


 * How is Cell weaker than Frieza?


 * The conept of all the Namekians fusing is ridiculous, and even if they did do such a thing it wouldn't result in someone so powerful. you have to remember that there were only 100 Namekians and that the strongest one had a power level of only 42,000.


 * All the characters are super OOC.


 * Gomeko


 * All the crap with Janemba at the end.


 * It's the biggest abomination I've ever read.


 * Super Nameko looking like the freaking Hulk.


 * There are random and meaningless pictures.


 * The fight scenes are boring and super unoriginal.


 * Everything about it.

Closing comments: It's terrible. It makes me want to stab myself in the eyes over and over again.

Rating: E-

Pros

 * In comparison to many SS11 stories, this story has decent grammar in the beginning. With that said, the grammar is still subpar.

Cons

 * No clear explanation for Goku/Piccolo fusion


 * No clear explanation for the Omega Shenron/King Piccolo/Other random guy fusion


 * Logically, King Piccolo would be useless in a fusion between two people that much stronger than him


 * A 7-way fusion? WTF?


 * Hero is the worst character ever devised. Ever.


 * Scratch that. Hero Kai is far worse.


 * "Krillan" defusing and then getting blown up. That made little to no sense.


 * Krillin would not have a large impact on the Hero Kai fusion, simply because he is far weaker than all the other fusees.


 * Story ends too abruptly.

Closing comments: Terrible. Terrible. One of the worst stories ever made.

Ranking: E-

Pros

 * I really like the premise of the story.


 * The mechanics are, in general, very good.


 * The similarities to early Dragon Ball is a great choice. I like that.


 * The different parts of the story, which are told from different characters, is an interesting choice.

Cons

 * Even if the mechanics are good, the writing is not good. The description is very plain and the vocabuary is rudimentary.


 * Tombstone Blue is simply not good for the first antagonist.


 * The fanon characters are very poorly developed and plain.


 * Nash is turning into something of a Gary-Stu.


 * The fight with Tombstone Blue is underwhelming.


 * Godom knocking Buu down is unrealistic.

Closing comments: Meh.

Rating: D+

Pros

 * The mechanics are fairly good.


 * Great diction.


 * Fairly original plot.


 * Battles are detailed.


 * The linking to the attacks is a great touch, although the occasional red link is irritating.

Cons

 * The sentence flow is very akward. The overuse of large words makes for some highly akward sentences. For example, "Chaiva was stunned. She had never seen Cuber’s true power before and now cursed at her comparable frailty." just reads terribly.


 * The formatting is strange. You have a bunch of short, choppy sentences of dialog, and then a block of text dedicated to a fight.


 * Many of the early fights and events are entirely inconsequential.


 * The story can be hard to follow.


 * There is little to no emotion in the writing. It's very plain.


 * Too rarely updated. I mean, you've had it for a while now, and you still haven't finished the first saga.

Closing comments: One of the top fanons on the site, but still with some glaring flaws.

Final ranking: B+

Pros

 * Utterly spectacular writing


 * Incredible character development


 * One of the most original stories, well, ever


 * The author developed a point in the timeline previously unseen


 * Some excellent impressionism of Tolkien


 * Nice Star Trek reference near the end


 * The scene where Buu owns the candy guy is one of the finest scenes on the wiki


 * The concluding poem is a masterpiece.

Cons

 * Although intentional, the verbosity can get tiresome and unclear


 * It seemed a bit inconclusive near the end, what with everything going back to the way it was before


 * You don't explain what happens to Baba, Babidi, and Goku

Closing comments: No significant flaws. Truly a magnum opus. I tip my hat to KidVegeta.

Rating: S+

Pros

 * It is about Krillin


 * Develops an unexpanded place in the timeline


 * Fantastic writing, spelling, grammar, etc.


 * The story is actually interesting


 * I like the idea of Krillin having better technique but lesser ability; somewhat reminds me of an old IP page


 * The psychological aspect is impressive

Cons
Closing comments: Perhaps this is in part due to my fanboyisms, but I prefer this to other acclaimed works like TF, ST, and TMT. Nice job for a first story, Brady Patrick!
 * To me, and maybe this is a bit contradictory of canon, but it seems unlikely that a temple would be completely focused upon fighitng

Overall rating == A+

question: is Sixth a reference to the dots on Krillin's head?

Pros

 * Excellent writing


 * Interesting concept


 * I like the way that at one moment, Chi-Chi is super sad emo person, but the next she portrays herself as happy-go-lucky mom. That abrupt shift in personality reminds me of Mr. Jaggers, in Great Expectations, and I very much do like it.

Cons

 * While this seems like it should have been a psychological type fanon, it instead came off as a gory blood fest. The blood fest isn't necessarily a bad thing, but I would've like a bit more introspect into her character rather than her cutting.


 * The dialog, to me, seems a bit strange, as though the author felt uncomfortable writing it.


 * Even for a one-shot, it is definitely on the short side; the actual story is only 550 words. Just my opinion here.


 * Her actions seem mildly out of universe. As one fanfic author has said, "Even though you and your friends cut your wrists, doesn't mean that Harry Potter does." This definitely rings true here, where it doesn't seem like something a character in Dragon Ball would do.

Closing Comments: I don't quite understand what people are gushing about with this story. It certainly has positive values, but it isn't really a standout story. With that said, it does certainly show signs of talent.

Rating: B

Pros

 * Typically solid grammar and spelling, although there are problems.


 * Okay writing i.e. good writing and whatnot.


 * Well detailed.


 * I like the small bits of humour sprinkled throughout, but most of the time it falls flat.

Cons

 * It's very hard to understand. Nigh incoherent.


 * Fanon characters are introduced without any backstory or explanation; they just exist


 * Story moves too quickly.


 * Super Buu shouldn't want peace, nor should he exist


 * 600,000 is actually high for a normal super Saiyan, as beforehand the strongest saiyan was around 12,000.


 * There's no plot, just fighting.


 * The plot progresses very jerkily.


 * Axurion is not my favorite fighter.


 * Huge, and I mean huge, blocks of text.


 * Why are these random fanon characters so strong?


 * Oh random fusion wonderful


 * Super Saiyan 5... great.


 * Super Buu eating emotions... wtf.


 * Auxurillon being more powerful than everbody is ridiculous.


 * Randomly going to Namek.


 * Bad power levels.


 * Chapter 4 makes little to no sense.


 * Terrible, terrible formatting.


 * Neo Super Saiyan is silly altogether.


 * Horrible overuse of commas


 * End of chapter 4 is just incomprehensible.

Closing comments: This is absolutely horrible. I don't know what's going on. It's just a random string of unexplained events. It shows little promise.

Rating: E-

Pros

 * Great detail, great writing, great mechanics, etc.
 * Nice subtle reference to Guldo
 * I liked the way you revealed PV's name; it had a lead-up to it. That was nice.
 * The story is certainly refreshingly subtle as a whole.
 * Yeah, it gives great insight into his character, it's reflective in an innovative way, all that stuff.
 * The amount of emotion given, and in such a vivid way, is incredible.

Cons

 * Because the entire fanon is set in a fanonical place, in an unknown point in the timeline, under an unknown scenario etc. it makes it a little hard to tell what is going on in the fanon. It's harde to care for a character whose notable character traits seldom come up and when there is little allusion to who his character is.
 * It's extremely hard to tell why PV is writhing about to begin with. It would have worked better had you given more clear reasons and given them earlier on, as it would help with sympathizing.

Closing Comments: While certainly a great fic with great introspect, it would have benefited from better organization to some extent and for some more explanation. It didn't need to be blatant, it just needed to be clear enough for one to read it and at least gain a rudimentary understanding of the motivations and situation of PV.

Rating: A

Dragonball KC
Please do note that this is indeed a humour story and therefore I will be reviewing it as such.

Pros

 * Random Super Saiyan 5.


 * No spelling or grammar content whatsoever.


 * Random King Kai


 * Goku rode upon Shenron like a horse but Shenron cared naught


 * Terrible terrible Out of Character.


 * LSS5 Broly lol


 * Random Super Saiyan 6


 * Vegeta can't argue with science


 * "I AM A DEVil"


 * Broly smached him in the face


 * Gohan just got off his sunglasses


 * Random Super Gogogeta


 * All the spontaneously achieved Super Saiyan levels


 * Raditz was too weak to fuse, but King Piccolo wasn't. Haha.


 * gogogetalotanks is epic man


 * "But i have mor too right nwo".


 * Random Naruto.


 * Dende randomly goes back to Namek. That's my favorite part.


 * Goku saves the day!!! as a whole makes little to no sense.


 * Mocking Cuber's quote was hilarious


 * Oolong appearing, but not being named.


 * " then vegito went bac in the ball and no more com. " what does that even mean? hahaha


 * Random Dalas


 * Krillin's appearance was incredible.


 * "Dalas got even madder and trew his cowboy hat and broked his scooter with anger."


 * Not explaining what happened to Dalas


 * Mr. Chokon has teh ons


 * Chokon sings Pretty Boy Swag. Hahaha.


 * The song breaks their ears and then kills them. Hahaha.


 * Dende sings Magic Carpet Ride.


 * "dendy grunted. Even bulma shake then chokon ti sig sparkyrie eye goes dry he tried but it no good. one time chokon jump but then he fefll. oops he say and die." What just happened?


 * F. Trunks and Korin, aptly named the cat, randomly appear.


 * Mr. Stan somehow beats Gohan


 * Korin beating F. Trunks. Hahaha.


 * Random Frieza fight.


 * " she amd necklice for super wish 3 times mega sherron sherron is too dtridag oh and he is sparkle blue" What could that possibly mean?


 * Sorry for spelling some is a hilarious mockery of Unlimated.


 * The story is simply hilarious as a whole.

Cons

 * Even if the nonsense parts are funny, it'd be nice to at least understand what was happening.


 * I wish it was updated a little bit more often.

Closing comments: This is perhaps the funniest story on the entire wiki and in all of history. It's so poorly written, so poorly executed... it's downright incredible.

Rating == S++

Pros

 * The writing is really quite good


 * I like the idea of the watchkeepers being powerless and Piccolo being the one to truly enforce hell


 * The idea of Frieza and Piccolo being far apart but still kinda having a verbal war is really wuite interesting, and I genuinely do like it


 * The middle of chapter 2, with the light growing from the book and whatnot, actually struck me as being quite epic


 * I like how ambiguous you keep the events of the story; it makes the tale seem far more epic


 * The story is very interesting, to say the least


 * Mace is a cool villain, although I hope to see him expanded on


 * The story as a whole is really quite suspenseful. I like the dramatic speech from Mace at the end of chapter 3.

Cons

 * Occasional misspellings, such as bowels as boughs or unbeknownst and unbenounced, but these are small enough to not impact reading too much


 * Strange usages of commas in some places makes for choppy reading


 * King Cold and Frieza are somewhat OOC, as their dialog is a bit too sophisticated, even for the elegant characters


 * The use of synonyms at times seems very akward


 * Writing can be vague and akward at times


 * They really should be calling him Piccolo, not the Green Man


 * Piccolo shouldn't have been able to so much as fight the likes of Cell and Dabura.


 * Dr. Gero's speech, although epic, was horribly OOC


 * The paragraphs can get to be a little bit long


 * King Kai is OOC, as his speech is too elegant


 * The story really could've used more buildup.


 * The dialog formatting is off; you should make a new paragraph for each line of dialog

Closing commets: This is a great story which shows definite signs of promise. The writing is great, the story interesting, the premise unique... I must say, this is really a refreshingly decent story. With that said, some aspects of the tale are still in need of expansion. I wish you the best of luck in continuing this fanon.
 * The story can be somewhat cliche.

Rating: B+

Pros

 * The writing is, to some degree, halfway decent.

Cons

 * Very cheesy writing


 * Terrible dialog


 * Random capitalizaion


 * The explanation for "Android 19" is one of the most laughable things I have ever read.


 * No, the bigger the number, the weaker they are. Hence why 18 is stronger than 19.


 * Everything, yes everything, about the scene with Colonol Gold and Major Gray.


 * None of the crap between Gero and Goku ever happened in the manga or anime.


 * Improper dialog formatting.


 * Even more bad dialog! I kid you not, that is among the worst dialog I have ever read.


 * All the stupid crap with Dr. Briefs.


 * Wow, the DNA collecting scene was horrid. The humour, the description, everything, it was all really bad.


 * The entire last chapter. Yes all of it. It was genuinely that bad.

Closing comments: The author clearly put very little effort into the fanon. The story was uninspired, to say the least, and altogether unsatisfying. I don't honestly think there was any point in writing or reading the fanon, and it is precisely why I never liked the idea of a fic like this to begin with. It had no purpose in being written, so far as I am concerned.

Rating: D-

Pros

 * I mean, to some extent the story is believable, as in the events could potentially happen, at least in the beginning.


 * Fight scenes weren't terrible

Cons

 * Pod should not be capitalized


 * Very cheesy dialog


 * A Saiyan's powerful should not be 36,500. That is utterly nonsensical.


 * Very cheesy names, such as Zucini


 * King Vegeta OOC


 * Improper formatting


 * Oh dear, the first half of chapter 2 is just an incoherent mess of bad dialog and people trying to talk to eachother


 * "When 3 Assexians attacked Toma at the same time, even the elite of elites could not win. "Hh..h.. Just a little more!" Toma muttered. "Darn those clouds. I'll have to do this myself! *Turns on the comunicator on scouter* King Vegeta! I'm very shamed to talk to you in the middle of fight, but we seriously need some back-up here! Anyone, low-class or an elite, we need more men! Asssexians are strong, but if we conquer them we'll get their technology and weapons which could make us even stronger than lord Frieza!" said Toma."

That simply makes no sense, at all.


 * Last part of chapter 3 is just bad. It's just horrible.


 * There's some very bad blocks of text in the story. Learn to use the enter key.


 * Oh my god, this writing is bad.


 * Great Apes. Now that's a Deus Ex Machina.


 * Seriously, wtf am I reading


 * I like the fact that they were shown to have a lower power level and then they were automatically defeated. Or something like that. I stopped being able to follow this fanon a while ago.

Closing comments: This is a very bad, nigh incomprehensible fic. To be frank, there isn't very much that's good about it, as it's virtually unreadable. I'm glad to see that the writer has improved since writing it.

Rating: E

Pros

 * Ha! That's a good one!

Cons

 * His meeting of Tang has no elaboration whatsoever, which makes the entire event implausible.


 * Question: who is Dimino the son of? I'm assuming Goku, but that doesn't really make sense because Chi-Chi would be infertile by the time of Z. If he is Tang's son, WHY IS HE ABLE TO GO SUPER SAIYAN?


 * Broly is dead. Why/how is he returning?


 * Oh, mecha Broly. That's an automatic con right there.


 * TANG. SHOULD. NOT. BE. A. SUPER. SAIYAN. (4.), especially not without explanation.


 * They would not waste their energy fighting prior to Broly's arrival.


 * Horrible dialog.


 * No buildup whatsoever.


 * Vegeta's death is completely meaningless.


 * Everyone is OOC.


 * Tang just punched Broly in the face. Yes, really, that's how the conflict is resolved. What type of story is this?


 * Ultra Super Saiyan 4. GTFO.


 * Tang and Dimino are both horrid Gary-Stus.


 * More random death, this time of Gohan and Trunks. You really don't understand how to include drama in a story.


 * There is an apostrophe before every s. This is highly infuriating.


 * Learn to put spaces after each comma and period.


 * You need a full moon to go Great Ape. You provide no such thing. Nor has it even been explained why they are saiyans to begin with. Furthermore, it is altogether implausible to think that they would not remove Dimino's tail.


 * Of course Dimino has a random, previously non-aforementioned girlfried who calms him down and makes him a Super Saiyan 4.


 * Broly becoming a gray Super Saiyan 4 is utterly preposterous.


 * Dimino becomes a Super Saiyan 5 simply because his daddy was almost killed. That's bloody bull right there.


 * Completely inexplicable Ultra Dragon for no goddamned reason whatsoever who randomly revives everyone who has died after standing around for 10 minutes, doing nothing. "All the sudden the sky turned dark and a new dragon came,his name is ultra dragon.10 min's later the dragon went away,and in a instant Goku,Trunk's,Vegeta,and Gohan came back." Seriously, what is that?


 * The fic, like all too many others, ended the exact same way that it began, with nothing being accomplished.

Closing comments: You might as well rename this fanon "Tang and Dimino: The New Gods". The fanon was meaningless, stupid, and had no redeeming qualities whatsoever. This was a horrible fanon in all ways imaginable.

Rating: E-

Pros

 * The spelling and grammar is actually quite good.


 * The writing is generally clear and easy to read, which makes the page much mor readable in my opinion. It's also somewhat conversational, which I very much.


 * I like that you actually explain certain events, such as why there are always attacked. That, at least in my opinion, makes the whole thing far more believable.


 * The page is well detailed and well organized, two qualities which many pages lack.


 * The Kitrans losing their power due to technology is something which really helps to make them realistic, at least in my opinion.


 * Events generally take reasonable amounts of time.


 * Their culture reminded me of communism, which, in all honesty, isn't really a bad thing. I found your take upon that political system interesting.


 * The interesting thing about them is that they rely not upon strength but instead upon skill, which is super cool.


 * The Cyborg Kitrans are a pretty cool idea, imo. I like that they have both pros and cons, much like this page. :)

Cons

 * The writing is very juvenile, at least in my opinion, but this isn't too major a problem.


 * I'd like something of an explanation for their existance; did they evolve from protoplasmic organisms or were they created by the Kais?


 * A bit more elaboration on their evolution would be nice, since there are varying theories as to how humans evolved.


 * It seems implausible that their enemies would teach them to use ki.


 * The whole thing about their weakening blood flow doesn't make much sense, to me.


 * I think that the attacks upon their planet could use some elaboration, at least in future renditions.


 * The whole thing about rollercoasters seemed random.


 * The whole part about circulation didn't make very much sense at all.


 * The page has a very limited connection to the actual DB universe, which kind of makes it meaningless.

Closing comments: This page really did kind of spark my interest. The race is unique, detailed, and interesting. However, its lack of connection made it seem pointless, which was truly the great flaw of the page. All in all, though, this is certainly not a bad page. I hope to see the species in some type of actual fanfiction eventually, as I think that would really be quite cool.

Rating: B-